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you can rely on me.
for you,
specially

I promise you,
I'm always there,
when your heart is filled with sorrows and despair.
I'll carry you,
when you need a friend;
You'll find my footprints in the sand.

Wanting to be your favorite hello & your hardest goodbye


dont judge

loves.

To love is to be vulnerable
I choose not to be

i won't hold you back.

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

You took a hammer to these walls,
Dragged the memories down the hall,
Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.
And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

thank you.

Layout: Kary-yan/Missyan.
Hosts: x o x


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Thursday, March 26, 2009


flying back to hk later!
HAHAHAHAHA!!
woots..
going on leave.. HAHA!
once in a while, 7-11 gotta go on leave to let people know the importance of it. :P
i'll be PERFECTLY FINE when i'm back. :D:D
don't miss me too much people..
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
cheer up people..
geokleng: don't bother about the BIG SIZE GIRL! not worth it to always spoil mood for her la. i mean boy will understand everything de ma.. so be normal to boy.. :) the BIG SIZE ASS is just jealous.
yingchin: hope you're fine with your boy. sometimes it's good to be like friends, sometimes it's not. but i'm sure the both of you will be fine. :D:D
stsp: hope you're alright with your parents alr.. sorry, ask you take lappy out to put the files in than in the end your dad like that..
ron: take your time, slowly get over things. yes, it is difficult. but just let nature take its course. don't go crazy, i wanna see the normal ron when i'm back.. it's difficult, cause you love her loads. don't think so much ok? i'll worry..
sebas: SHIT YOU! JUE JIAO! BYE BYE! STOP ACTING CUTE.. EEEK! GET LOST FROM MY LIFE! LALALA!

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY DADDY! :D:D
hope you like the things i prepared. :)
I LOVE YOU DADDY!

i'm sorry, but it's your loss to break the friendship.
IT'S NOTHING TO ME.
i don't bother at all. no you, i still have many other people who care.
i won't care if you DON'T appreciate.
whatfor i be so shameless to stick to you, trying to bring back the friendship when you don't even want me this friend in the first place?
you know what? you're such a pathetic fella. i'm sorry, but you ended the friendship just because you think i liked you.
i don't. and so what if i really do? does that mean 2 people, either 1 having feeling for the other, cannot be friends at all?
you have your reasons i know, but please, don't ever torture a 2nd person who cherish you alot by not even clarifying.
thank god, that things are finally over, that i can have my sleep back, and not becoming 憔悴 just because of you. it still hurts though..

i fell hard, but here i am today, standing up again, stronger than before.


1:00 AM


Wednesday, March 25, 2009


you WERE 与众不同 in my life.

i'm fine people! :D
maybe still having a lil hard time, but i'll be perfectly fine when i'm back! :D
lalala..
i won't because of 1 stupid dumb person and cause the others who care about me to be zzz.
thanks people, for caring.
sorry if i made you guys zzz
sorry if i spoiled your mood or whatever this few days.
sorry for things that i didn't notice that may make you guys unhappy.

p.s:
-thanks rene.. for being there to listen and giving me such great advices..
-thanks sebas, for the card and the gift. and of course, i'll stand stronger than before. :)
-thanks lichin, for listening. hope you get over your troubles real soon..
-thanks kim! and take care of your leg..
-thanks ron! take care and take your time to get over!
-I'M SO GLAD TO HAVE YOU PEOPLE IN MY LIFE! IF MY ARMS ARE LONG ENOUGH, I WANNA GIVE ALL YOU GUYS A BIG TIGHT HUG! :D
-thanks elijah..
i'll nvr drop a tear for you, for the friendship, ever again. i know what to do, i won't bu yao lian. :D

sometimes, it ain't a good thing to be too honest to people.
cause when you are, people will still doubt if you're saying the truth.
and sometimes after that, they'll just dump you there.
some things are just better to be kept inside and not told. :D


12:54 AM


Monday, March 23, 2009

you're important. SO WHAT?! i'm MORE important.
if you don't care, i WON'T bother too.
you don't want me, i won't want you too.
if you don't appreciate, i WON'T even bother to care.

if only i can think this way.

i feel like a fool.
doing so much for the friendship.
in the end, people just take me as a joke, as a fool.
and once again, this showed that promises are meant to be broken. :)

lalala!
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!
BACK TO HK IN FEW DAYS TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!
sings :' my life go sha la la la la...'

now i finally understand..

i'm insane. :) hate myself for being the way i am now.


9:02 PM


Sunday, March 22, 2009

oh shit.
is this a joke or smth..
don't give me false hope when all hopes are gone.
don't make me fall again.
i'm prepared for the worst, but it won't mean i'll be able to take it.
i'll break down, really hard.
please..
don't joke anymore..
oh lord, help me... arghh..

tai ga yan's dead on 22/3 @2150.

does this mark the fullstop? the end of the story? thanks for the short, sweet, fun & happy story though.


8:13 PM



things are going meaningless.
i don't see any point, any reason in anything anymore.
lost hope, lost faith, lost myself.
last emo post. i hope so..


12:48 AM


Saturday, March 21, 2009

seriously, i give up.
i don't know what else can i do anymore.
maybe just give time.
but i seriously can't take it anymore..
it hurts.. GREATLY, DEEPLY.

to my dearest friend, the one friend whom left such a great impact in my life, the friend i loved so much, the friend whom i enjoy so much so much when i'm with you, the friend who i could talk to about everything and anything under the sky, the friend who treated me as a joke.
if you don't like the things, THROW!
this is the last thing i'll do for the friendship.
you don't wanna see me, i won't appear in your life EVER AGAIN!
what i got from you was
'wah. you really come here. Zz. so late. -.- thanks anyway. I was out with my friend. Ps. Forgot.'
ohh. so you thought i was joking about everything.
so to you this friendship was a joke, everything i said was a joke
and i was just a freaking joke in your life!
thanks man.
thanks for letting me know that.
it's never too late to know.
thanks for shattering the last bit of hope that i was having.
thanks for letting me know that i'm just a freaking joke.
thanks for letting me know that everything i did for the friendship was just a SHITTY JOKE!
i'd rather you tell me straight in my face this: 'can you please freaking get out of my life? you're so damn irritating and i would never want to see you again!'.
this would be much better.
you were someone that i treasured most.
thanks for stabbing me hard again.
i'll go..
it's been 93057382 years since i last saw you on9. obvious enough. rest assured. i promise i will never disturb you again. :) take care. and lastly, sorry.

anyway, no worries humans. I'M PERFECTLY FINE!
I LOVE MY ALL OF YOU OUT THERE!
THANKS FOR CARING!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! :):)


12:55 AM


Friday, March 20, 2009

had a nice day ytd with girlfs,
had nice chats with them, nice movie time.
people, all girlfs, don't think so much.. things will be fine. :)
don't be too troubled by things yea.. :)
anything, i'll be here.. :D:D
take care.. and get enough rest and stuff.. i don't wanna see my girls in a very shag state.. :)

had a nice day bbq-ing with W16H people today..
thanks people for caring.. :)
you guys are great bunch of people..
thanks sebas for pei-ing me all the way to sembawang, than send me home, than go home.. :)
thanks kim for listening! :)
thanks gloria, for the BBQ! :D:D
thank god for everything.. :)
didn't regret going..


1:48 AM


Tuesday, March 17, 2009

it feels SO DAMN GOOD TO BE ABLE TO SLEEP WELL!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
has been don't know how many thousand years since i slept well.
not even 5 mins sound asleep le..
and NEVER WAKE UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT!!
WOOTS!!
BEST THING THAT CAN EVER HAPPEN TO ME!!
hope everyday can be like this luhs..
i hate it when i can't sleep..
girlfs outing tmr.. :D:D
*jumps around*

maybe things just takes time..
hope time will let everything be back the same


9:46 PM


Thursday, March 12, 2009

i need time..
away from here, away from everything..
so bye peeps..
and sorry people, for causing so much troubles..


1:32 PM


Tuesday, March 10, 2009

people.. i'm sorry for being one of the reasons that cause the outing to day to be cancelled.
i know it's my fault.
sorry..
for making you guys leave the date out and in the end me, causing everything to be canceled.
sorry.


6:04 PM


Monday, March 9, 2009

oh god!
I HAVE A GREAT DAD WHO ADD TROUBLES TO MY FRIENDS.
... sorry li chin..
MY FREAKING DAD JUST DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO LISTEN.


11:47 PM


Sunday, March 8, 2009

sad..
i can't find cheap and nice papaya to make my papaya milk...
:(:(
ARGHHHH!
boring life..
mum's back in hk..
dad's gonna do work till late at night everyday..
that means i gotta make myself dinner..
which i most probably won't..
take care people! :)


9:43 PM


Saturday, March 7, 2009

suddenly, i don't wanna go to church..
not motivated to.
i don't know.. just...
yea..
and sometimes, i'm think.
what would happen if i die tmr?
nah. i'm not being negative..
just thinking.. i'm not gonna give up, and i nvr will. i'll try and try till things get back the same. no matter how long, how difficult.


10:13 PM


Thursday, March 5, 2009

still thinking about the convo i had with Stsp..
one part was about 10 years down the road, when we girls meet again..
LOLL!! (by then we won't be girls anymore..)
so far ahead.. but yea.. i hope we'll still be contacting and close at that time..
we may have our own families by then..
HAAHAHAHA!
i'm alr imagining the scene. -.-
those happily married shall bring the whole family out.
than she'll say to the kid(s) 'call auntie..'
and than we'll chit chat.. talk about everything anything under the sky..
i think by then we need a thousand days to finish what we wanna share with one another..
LOLLLL!! wth..
by then we'll be so old..
HAHAHA!!
but yea.. it'll be so sweet..
ok.. why the heck am i talking about all these.. LOLLL!


11:39 PM


Wednesday, March 4, 2009

had a nice chat with Stsp ytd. :D
and we grew up alot!
:D:D
and someday, we should really go back to our S11 and slack one whole day,
order our fav ban mian, sit at our fav table.
make our dear geok leng bring the ban mian to the table..
like what we always do after school..
:D:D


11:33 AM


Tuesday, March 3, 2009

YAY!!
succeeded with my PAPAYA MILK!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!
:D:D:D:D:D
WHEEEEEEEEEEEE


1:10 PM


Monday, March 2, 2009

tired.. if you understand what i mean..

i tried my best..
to save the friendship, to make things seem the way it used to be..
but it just seems that you don't give a damn anymore. what does this friendship mean to you anyway?


10:40 PM


Sunday, March 1, 2009

is it just me or what?
why does it seem that i have a communication prob with everybody?
am i the weird one or what?
now that i think back, i seriously think that there's very little people i can talk to PROPERLY, about everything, anything.
is it that i expect too much from others??
or am just being too sensitive?
suddenly, i just there's a big communication barrier between me and everybody else. -.-
ARGHHHHH!
whatever it is...
who bothers anyway..


9:11 PM