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you can rely on me.
for you,
specially

I promise you,
I'm always there,
when your heart is filled with sorrows and despair.
I'll carry you,
when you need a friend;
You'll find my footprints in the sand.

Wanting to be your favorite hello & your hardest goodbye


dont judge

loves.

To love is to be vulnerable
I choose not to be

i won't hold you back.

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

You took a hammer to these walls,
Dragged the memories down the hall,
Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.
And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

thank you.

Layout: Kary-yan/Missyan.
Hosts: x o x


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Friday, February 27, 2009

lalala..
safely, happily at home today..
not gonna step out of the house today.
lalala..
it feels good to be at home!!
lalala.
but i feel like going for dance.. :(:(
i hate to stay in this place..
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH..
don't know anyone..
i wanna go back to potong pasir..
grrrrr..
why do people always expect others to take initiative when they themselves don't do so?
it is not something you should take for granted..


♥ 2:33 PM


Thursday, February 26, 2009

today is super tiring...
shall not say more. not in the mood to..
WAS FOLLOWED BY SOME PERVERT!!
THE WORST PART WAS I ONLY NOTICE TILL I STEP INTO THE LIFT!!
and he followed me in and ask me if we can be friends. WTH!
i said no and he continued. WTF!
ARGHHHH!
WTH!!
shit!!!
I AM SO NOT GONNA GO OUT OF THE HOUSE..
scared...
why must this happen to me.
!@#$%^&*()
why must there be humans like this on earth..
WHAT HAVE I DONE WRONG LAST LIFE TO DESERVE THIS?!!
potong pasir got this kinda ppl. now i move to eunos also have..
WTH IS THIS MAN!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
and suddenly, i realized.
that you won't be there for me anymore.
at least, not like what it was in the past.
maybe i was relying on you too much when we were close friends..
but, at the same time..
i found out that many other people that i thought who won't care cared for me..
which makes me think even more..
does that misunderstand really pull us apart so much??
to the extent that now, when i need you, you won't be there anymore?
that you don't even bother caring? dumbooo, i seriously miss those times.


♥ 10:16 PM


Tuesday, February 24, 2009

anw.. went to watch he's just no that into you (i think) with sebas.
and i find out that we got serious communication prob! LOL!
anw.. thanks sebas for the treat. :)
hmm.
they say girls will always remember their first crush..
i think a girl will rmb all (don't care how many they have) if she's serious about them.
cause there bound to be something special about each of them that will let her rmb for life..
yea.. i agree that many people always give reasons to make themselves feel better though they know that the other person is NOT interested in them..
and they'll folishly wait for their call, text, mails whatever when after dont know how many days, not even 1 is recieved.
why do people even bother to think and miss someone whom they know that they don't even bother to contact you..
but sometimes, there's just no reason.. i know..
sigh* life's so ..........................
anyway.. went to take my new passport yesterday..
IT'S SO UGLY UGLY!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
i prefer the old one..
yea.. shall not comment more..
this few days keep transferring things from the old notebook to this new one.
saw the ppt i made for my dumboo..
and than.. i see the distant between us now..
i miss those days where we will talk about anything and everything under the sky..
sorry, for things that had happened, sorry, for making things the way it is now. and sorry, for being selfish..
i just want you to know that this friendship made a great difference in my life, that you made a great difference in my life.
i just want you to know that i'll nvr wanna lose this frienship, nvr wanna lose you.
ok.. i sound like i'm biao bai-ing..
but yea.. this is what i wanna say all these while..
i feel bad, i don't feel good.
i don't know what to do.
but i'll be fine soon. no worries.. :)


♥ 12:32 PM


Monday, February 23, 2009

why do people whom you want them to stay, goes?
and those whom you want them to go, stays?
why is it that those whom you care for the most, don't appreciate the care you give them,
but yet, those whom you don't care much sees how much you care for them?
why is it that best buddies will never take in what you say,
but those whom you give random comments remembers?
why close friends only hear but strangers listen?
why is it that the more you value someone, the higher chance of that person leaving?
why will there be obstacles, when things seems to be going sooo smoothly..

i always tell people that in RP, we have to get use to people come and go FAST.
but it's still the most difficult thing..
i'm scared to go to the new class, to meet new people..
too comfortable with the people i am with now.. don't want to go..
especially when i meet some people, whereby i can really be myself..
i'm afraid that when we change class, we'll no longer care about each other, talk to each other and stuff..
i don't want.. oh noo..

I MISS MY DUMBOOOOOOO..
my fault.. the friendship's go, going, gone..
we're more like strangers now.... :) taigayan is such a failure in being a friend.


♥ 10:06 PM


Sunday, February 22, 2009

RESULTS WILL BE OUT TMR AFTER 10!!!
......................
oh no....
scared that iI'll fail a module or I'll need to repeat one.
I DON'T WANT TO!!!
I'm much more obedient in Sem 2 compared to Sem 1 ok...
I skipped/partial much lesser lessons..
if I still fail...
I SHALL KILL MYSELF!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
I AM HAPPY TODAY!!
cause i ATE ALOT!
after church went to the foodcourt to eat sliced fish noodles,
than after that met kim, ron, sebas for popeyes.. in the end only only ate fries...
AND THAN!!! i thought what buffet they going..
in the end it was the DUMB ASS SEOUL GARDEN WHICH I HATE MOST!!
THERE'S NOT MUCH THING FOR ME TO EAT!!
ROARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
but stilll... i ATE ALOT!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
but after that.. i smelled of the SEOUL GARDEN SMELL!
STINK OK! which i hate most...
ZZZ. :D:D
anw.. i shall dance them all out tmr.. :D:D


♥ 10:09 PM


Saturday, February 21, 2009

bored @ home..
woke up a lil too early.
hungry.. but there's no food!!
AHHHH!
i'm hungry.. :(
A HUNGRY TIGER IS AN ANGRY TIGER!!
ROARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR~
life's so contradicting.
when we're there's something for us to do, we complain that we're busy.
when there's nothing, we complain that it's bored.
life...
WHAT'S LIFE WITHOUT FOOD!!!
so sad.
ok.. i'm just bored. trying to kill time here.

this is a redundant post.


♥ 11:21 AM


Wednesday, February 18, 2009

The thing about addictions is it never ends well,
because eventually, whatever that was getting us high stops feeling good and starts to hurt.
Still, they say you don't kick the habit until you hit rock bottom.
But how do you know you're there?
Because no matter how badly that things are hurting us,
sometimes letting go,
hurts even worse.


♥ 11:19 PM


Tuesday, February 17, 2009

suddenly, i feel like crying..
and i realized how weak i am.
i always thought that i'm strong enough, independent enough for everything and anything.
i dont want people to worry for me, so i show a strong side no matter what..
but suddenly i feel so lonely..
sometimes i still want someone to be there for me.
to lend me their ears when i wanna say something, to lend me their shoulder when i feel like crying.
but why.. no one's there anymore.
or is it just me, creating a wall so that i can't reach others, just me who's not telling?
i want to.. but i don't know how to..
i'm trying to open up and tell the ppl around me about everything.
i know many people will be there for me, and is willing to listen to me..
but i can't. it's not everyone tt i feel comfy opening up to them and telling them stuffs.
i wanna voice up to my parents about my unhappiness. but they wont listen.
i wanna tell my friends, but they have their own troubles too...
i don't wanna be a burden..
i don't want my unhappiness to affect others.
oh no...

if only...


♥ 11:23 PM


Friday, February 13, 2009

They love you but they aren't your lover.
They care for you but they aren't your family member.
They are ready to share your pain but they are not in your relation.
They are...

FRIENDS!

True friends scolds like a DAD,
Cares like a MOM,
Teases like a SISTER,
Irritates like a BROTHER,
and finally,
Loves you more than a LOVER.


♥ 5:28 PM